COUGH COUGH obvious COUGH

On an unually uncaring manner, I really don't feel like doing that catalog. It needs to get done, and all the burden rests on my shoulders, and I SHOULD be doing it, and if I'm not doing it I should go to bed in order to be able to wake up tomorrow and do it, but I just don't really want to do it. And it's not like I'm mad or anything, or resent it (which I am and do), but I just don't care.

I watched Garden State a few minutes ago. That was an interesting and good movie. I really thought it was great. I didn't enjoy it, and it was slow and drawn out, and perhaps a bit obvious and preachey, but I really, really liked it. Zach Braff wrote and directed a good movie. And Natalie Portman was perfect in it too. Good characters, good pace, good everything...

But now I feel so empty, and disillusioned, and meaningless. No, maybe the exact opposite, I feel important, and everything else feels meaningless. The catalog which I was so stressed about doesn't seem to matter anymore. It will get done, one way or another, I have the support of my co-workers and boss, and they will stick up for me. And more than that I know I can do it. I've been in worse situations. And if it doesn't get done, who cares? I don't care. I'll do my best, but if it doesn't get done it will because it can't be done, not because I am weak or I am unable to do it.

Does any of that make sense? Probably not huh.

IESSO

PS. Ignore the lameness of the joke, and focus on the lameness of the image itself. It'll make you feel better.
PPS. It's purely coincidence that the topic of the post is kinda deep and meaningful, and at the same time the image is about religion. No link intended. But if you want to make that link, that's fine by me.

TELEKENESIS = PIECE OF CAKE

I got my marks back for the semester in Communication Design 4, or as we call it for short CD4, good stuff: HIGH DISTINCTION! WWOOOOTTT!!! Mostly thanks to my Liveworm marks of 90% I'm very please. I got third for LW. A few people beat me, a notable exception from the list: Kat. BOO and also, YA.

But yeah, now I have a massive headache, from my MASSIVEly swollen head.

On the reverse side of that coin though: I have a project that is due thursday, and the client came in today with MAJOR changes. The spelling of everything is wrong (not my fault though, it's a foreign language and THEY spelt things wrong), there are major changes to essays, and worst yet, the entire order is different from what I was told. UGG.

I don't know how I'm physically gonna get this done. I have a day to do this, 96 pages, and it takes about an hour to do 4 - 5 pages.... NIGHTMARE.

Karma dude, karma...


IESSO

PS. Judging by my awesome design skills, typified by this example, it's a wonder I didn't get 100% huh?

BEE-BOP BEE-BOP

Elvira needed to pick up her bass guitar (I'm not sure if the 'guitar' is superfluous or not, but anyway) and she didn't really wanna pay for parking in the city ($14 minimum!) so Linus and I were given the orders to drive around the block a few times until she was ready to be picked up. First of all I can't drive, and secondly Linus can't really drive a manual all that great, and he doesn't have the best record for driving cars in general (a few accidents) and doesn't have a license for manual cars, so we were certainly in for an adventure.

Suffice to say apart from some near misses (aren't near misses crashes?! you nearly missed; you didn't miss, anyway) no horns were honked but we did do some last minute lane merging and got into some shanigans (!) but we didn't die. The point is we were driving around in circles and it started to seem like we were those cars in Grand Theft Auto that just drive around until someone car jacks us... funny. ANYWAY maybe you had to be there, I dunno...

ALSO: On the train on the way up to Brisbane the train (now that's superfluous!) was full of kids. But not normal grubby, wipe-their-noses-on-their-sleeves style kids, oh no! These kids were stylish. The girls had dresses, and funky skirts and stockings with boots, and the boys had polo shirts with their collars up, and one girl (who was like 2-3) had a flowing skirt and hip doll shoes, and they were strutting their stuff, doing mini catwalk runs up and down the train. It must have been some sort of model convention or something, but these kids were cool cats. There was one scruffy kid, who must have been some sort of rebel (he plays by his own rules man!) who wasn't dressed up, but had torn jeans and a black t-shirt, who was strangling the model kids. That kid rocked! I could just imagine him with some sort of drugged out 5 year old, and a cigarette hanging out of his mouth, wearing some badass sunglasses, not caring what other thought of him.

My hero in 5 year old form.

I'm Elliott Scott, idolising 5-year-olds, signing off.

PS. Lot's o' punctuation marks today!

MILK, MILK, LEMONADE

If you're thinking of redesigning your room onto a classic 60's funk bachelor pad (as I've always wanted to do), perhaps give these shelves a miss. Nothing says 'creepy weirdo' more than a pair of breasts that open up to reveal wine. Ok perhaps a vag.... ANYWAY! They're so blatantly sexual it makes my skin crawl. And not in a good way either. Call me old-fashioned but sex should be in the bedroom, with locked doors, curtains drawn, lights out, and at least one person crying in the fetal postition!

IESSO

PS. Dont even ask how I found this picture. It's not a pleasant story. Many hardships and woe were endured. And that's not a metaphor!

AS KEANU REEVES SAYS IN EVERY SINGLE MOVIE: 'WOAH'

I've finally finished my portfolio for the semesters work. And for the first time I'm almost proud of it. And to celebrate this momentous occasion I've made it available for your viewing pleasure in this teeny tiny version for the blog. If (and not that you would) you would like to see a full sized version, let me know and I can kidnap you in the middle of the night, blindfold you, drive yuo to a secret location and show it to you. Or email. Whatever's easier..

I'm Batman, signing off

BOYS DON'T CRY

I've finished my portfolio for the semester. Overall I'm kinda pleased with it. I've noticed a marked improvement with my work since I've started working at Liveworm. It's still not great, and I don't really like any of it, but it's getting there. In particular I am happy with my depression brochure (ironic?!) anyway, I think it's pretty cool; black sillouettes and a rainbow swirl.

IESSO

HEAVY METAL HURTS MY FINGERS

I woke up this morning and started work.

The problem with my Powerbook, and Powerbooks in general is that it's made of metal. And in winter it can get quite cold sitting on my desk overnight. And I'm talking actually COLD! So cold that my fingers didn't want to touch it. So cold that scientists trying to reach 'absolute zero' should come over to my house at 6.00am and look at my Powerbook. Instead of being powered by mice in wheels like most people's computers my PBook is powered by little penguins on ice slippery slides.

Thankfully the PBook has an awesome design flaw that is quite advantageous in these winter months; it's prone to over heating. In summer it gets so hot that camels... ok, nevermind, but it does get quite warm, warming my nearly frost-bitten fingers in about half an hour. Sweet. Design flaw? Or super-genius design!?

Design flaw.

IESSO

SHAKESPIZZLE

Here is a totally different concept for the Nash Theatre play 'Titus and Andronicus'. Ok, well the play isn't actually by Nash, but they're performing it. Anyway, as mentioned in a previous post (below) the play is modern and graffiti themed. So like the designer slut that I am, I adhere to this style. Except with a twist. The poster is printed on clear plastic, with a white layer under the title, which means anywhere you place the poster the background shows through, giving the effect of graffiti.

A clever idea, if perhaps not the best production values.

IESSO

MS. HOOVER, WHAT'S A DIARAMA?

Instead of drawing and designing something of quality, Elliott decided to make a model. And, oh man, what a big mistake! I caught the train up to uni, excited to make the model and all that jazz. Catch the 8 o'clock train, well that was the plan. Trains weren't running because of a power failure. WHAT!? Not "there will be delays" or "you'll need to catch a train to somewhere, catch a bus, then a train again." Nope. Trains simply weren't running.

I went back home. Caught the train at 11, changed trains at Beenleigh, caught a bus to Kuraby from Kingston, and then another bus to South Bank. Got there at 1. Made the model by 1.30. Easy.

It looks good. But damn was I stressed!

Anyway whatever. My thoughts are kinda racing at the moment. Can't. form. coherent. sentences.

IESSO

PS. I totally found out the Messy Haired Girls name. It's Gemma. On the one hand I'm happy to know her name, and it's a nice name, it suits her, all the good stuff, but on the other hand some of the mystery is gone. The infatuation might actually turn into something a little less stalker-ish.

PPS. No, I didn't talk to her. I didn't see her. But I bumped into some of her friends.... maybe they'll say something to her. I can't see how that'd be bad. RIGHT!? She'll know I'm interested....

A PHONE STORE? A COSMETICS BOUTIQUE?

Here is my concept of what the totally mega-awesome phone store Glow will be looking like. And it's it just breathtaking? No? Well ok, maybe you're right. The photoshopping is pretty poor at best. But it's getting there.

I'll do some illustration work of point of sale crap and call it a day. And of course by that I mean I've done half of what I've got to do. Half. That's more than a third right? Oh god I'm screwed...

IESSO

OH and also, this guy is my new hero! He rocks. Song sucks. But he rocks!! That's right baby, double exclamation marks!

NAZI CODEBREAKERS CAN'T STOP ME ANY MORE!

Ok, so that made a LOT more sense in my head. But hopefully it'll make at least some sense when you read the post.

#

So I've been thinking: The Messy Hair Girl. I should really just ask her out. I should stop wussing out of it, or making lame excuses or all the other stupid things I do like talk myself out of it, and hype up my insecurities to a point where I sleep on the floor in Liveworm*. F*CK IT! I'll do it! I want to go out with her, and there's no real reason I shouldn't at least ask her. What's the worse that could happen?

She's such an enigma (hint hint^) I know nothing about her. She has a cool voice though. Kinda Scarlett Johansson-ish. I've talked to her a few times but I never actually officially met her. So I don't even know her name. I remember reading a name tag, but I can't remember what it said...

UG. I don't even know how to ask her out. It's been SSSSooooo long since I asked a girl out. I mean successfully that is. Where they said yes. Does anyone have any good advice? I suppose not huh? It's kinda one of those 'need to be there' setups.

Well I know this; she walks past the studio on tuesdays. I see her walk by! I'm not stalking her. I'm infatuated with her (not iPods this time!) It's the mystery. Oh and her extreme beauty. Of course.

Well I'll keep you posted. Expect nothing though. I really am crap at this game.
IESSO

* You know what I'm talkin' about!
^ The Nazi's used a coding machine in WW2. The Allies called it the Enigma Machine.
# The photo isn't of the MHG. I dunno who she is, she's just a photo I found on the net. She means nothing to me! .... although she is quite mysterious looking...

OH NOT AGAIN!

However crazy I say I am, or you think I am, that's nothing compared to how crazy I think I am.

Yep, that's right folks it's time for another Elliott Whining Post TM! If you're not empathetic minded or not in the mood for putting up with my crap, scroll down to the orange square and everything will be just fine.

I'm still thinking about her.
You REALLY need a girlfriend, you might say. But do I? Is that really the solution to the problem? Is that even the problem at all? I am I lonely and that's all it is? Or is there something more?

Well I have no idea. But at any rate I miss something. I miss the closeness, the love, the loving, the intimacy, but I think I miss her too. She was a cool person. I like and liked hanging out with her, doing things, all that stuff. I wish I could be her friend... I think.

And I write letters to her all the time. Luckily I've learnt not to send them anymore, that always ends in disaster, but I still write them in my head. Dear A... blah blah blah. They're gotten less bitter and sad and nostalgic and more optimistic in recent months. But I still write them.

I guess this is all normal huh? I've never had a proper breakup before so this is my first, and obviously I'm not the best at handling it. But why do other people handle them so much better? It is them? Is it the other person? Is it just the fact that I'm more vocal about them?

I dunno.

In fact I can't even articulate my thoughts properley. I had a letter written. I was going to post is up on the blog, decided against it, and instead was going to write my thoughts down. But I can even do that properley. I guess I'm just a bit down today. It's like a rollcoaster with me and my emotions. Except instead of being built on normal FLAT ground, this rollcoaster is built on a step decline. That would be a good metaphor except that it's not. It's really not.

To quote my pal Dermot: "The glass is neither half empty nor half full. It's not even what I ordered in the first place."

Ok, well my 55 minutes are up anyway... thanks Doc.
IESSO

GAWK IN AWE

Here is a revised version of the image below. I guess it sorta defeats the purpose of showing the crappy one, but what ever. This is what happened when I unleashed 'the beast' (Photoshop) onto the image. I am well aware of how gross that sounds, but honestly that wasn't my intention.... not yet anyway. No. I kid. Anyway you what Krusty the Klown looks like without his shirt on, he's got that white face and yellow body. Yeah. Not related to this image in any way.

IESSO PART 1



I'm not really a HUGE fan of hers, although admittedly I have seen Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen and the extremely well written (thanks to Tina Faye) Mean Girls, but I came across this picture of her and just had to draw it.

I'm not very good at drawing people, so this is probably one of my better attempts. The Jesus drawing looks too much like Brad Pitt for my liking, so I wanted to do something else. Yes, fine, it is just tracing, but it's still not easy. Getting the colors right and all that fiddly stuff is actually pretty had. I'm really pleased with her hair and eyes... The eyes have 5 different colors in them, plus the highlights which add even more colors.

Overall I'm pretty pleased, but you'll surely find something to criticise...

IESSO

PS. It's Lindsey/Lindsay Lohan in case you couldn't have guessed. Either due to my poor drawing abilities or your utter idiocy.

MY HOW YOU'VE GROWN

Still sick like a monkey. But I've been able to do a little bit of work... less and less each day though.

Anyway as suggested by Linus I'd added an image of a girl. Although I couldn't really find a good image on stock.xchng. But I did find a good Victorian image of 4 young women. Which at least fits the theme, even if it doesn't look the nicest.

It's a weird dilemma. Do I design for myself? Or for the brief. I don't really like this style or the style of the Titus & Andronicus poster, but they seem to fit the idea. But I don't like them...

IESSO

LITTLE, TEENY-TINY WOMEN

Here's a poster I did for the Nash Theatre company. I generally like the style, the delicate femininity, but its missing something. An image perhaps. Does anyone have any suggestions?

Thanks again
IESSO

OH YEAH, I HAVE A BLOG TO UPHOLD

Yeah I'm sorry about being slack. It's been hectic at Liveworm and uni. I've got about 10-15 assignments to do by next week. Oh yeah, and I'm sick too...

Here are two of the designs I've got to do:

MOBILE PHONE LOGO'S



Mobii is a phone company offering basic and entry level phone packages. I developed my logo based on simple shapes, simple colors, and fun. With kids in mind. And this time in a legal sense. HOORAY!
The font I used was Arial Rounded Bold but I bolded it up to the max, altered the shape of the m, butted the letters together in the Elliott standard, and mucked around with the I's. The colors are a slight gradient, which resembles the 'Aqua' look for Mac OSX but less obvious and intrusive.



Glow is the other end of the consumer spectrum. They offer high-end phones, with all the bells and whistles. I wanted to avoid the standards of 'techno' styling, particularly blue and silver color schemes or the 'Matrix-styles' or green and black. Unfortunately I did use green and black, but it's different.
The font is Futura Light (one of my default faces) and the glowing green O. I like the contrast between the perfect circles and the harsh capital M and W's. I highlighted this difference, in the subtext.

Overall I guess I like these logo's, but at this stage I just don't care anymore. So yeah, whatever.

NASH THEATRE POSTER



The basis of the poster is Graffiti. The play is a contemporary version of Shakespeares tradgedy. The director is using the plays base to tackle issues relating to George Bush, Tony Blair, Saddam Hussein and blah blah blah. Eyeroll. Anyway, I didn't want to put famous faces on the poster. In fact I wanted to limit the amount of graphics. WOW! Just type?!




Ok, if you don't like them, that's cool, let me know why. And I will ignore you. I mean embrace your criticisms.

Thanks

IESSO

WHAT WOULD JIMINY CRICKET HAVE TO SAY ABOUT ALL THIS?

I was sitting outside as I usually do enjoying the cold air and polluting my lungs with hot smokey air, when I saw a shooting star. I immediately made a wish. I went back inside, watched some TV and forgot about it. Two hours later I go outside again, look up at the sky, see another shooting star. And another. And another. I must have seen five or six tonight.

WEIRD! Especially how I hadn't seen one for years. In fact I've only ever seen one since I've been in Australia.

Does anybody know if there was a meteor shower tonight? I hope so. And not just my mind playing tricks on me.

Which brings me to my next and entirely more pointless question, if you're watching a meteor shower, does each shooting star count for a wish, or is it the total SS's that do? Just to be on the safe side, I only made one wish, well actually the same wish 6 times. I'd tell you what it was but A) You can probably guess it anyway, and B) It's bad luck.

I'm Elliott Scott, not normally superstitious, signing off

NO NEWS IS GOOD NEWS

Hey there guys, I firstly want to thank you for readng my blog, despte the fact I haven't posted anything for a while. It's not that I don't want to post anything, or have been too busy (well maybe a little bit), but NOTHING post-worthy has happened to me this week.

I got my laptop back (finally) and it's had a new DVD-burner put in (it goes up to a whopping 8X which kicks the ass of the 1X I had before) and that's about it.

I went out with some friends from work on friday, that was fun, except I had to stay relatively sober cuz I was going out with my mom on her birthday the next day. It was funny C and J got pretty smashed pretty quickly, which was weird for me to watch. But funny. They were more of themselves. C got louder and more silly, J was more self doubting and sad. It wasn't good. She's an awesome girl, who has no reason to doubt herself.

The trains up to Brisbane are having some work done to the track, which sucks for all the travellers. You have to catch 2 trains, then a bus then another train just to get up there. SUCKS!

On the ride home I overheard a funny conversation between a goth nerd and an animator:

GN: So, what do you do for a living?
A: Oh, I'm an animator. I draw pictures and illustrate things and shit like that.
GN: So what do you play?
A: Um.. what?
GN: What games are you playing?
A: I don't play games, I earn a living.
GN: Oh.

Funny. The goth nerd doesn't realise that not everyone plays games. I thought it was particularly weird because of my classes about vernacular and speech patterns and stuff. Some people thought that "What do you play?" was going to enter into our everyday sayings, because of the trend that people are playing more video games these days. Maybe not everyone got that memo.

IESSO

PS. Yes I am aware of the irony of me being high-and-mighty about speech patterns and all that, when I can't even spell things right.

IT'S ALMOST CHRISTMAS ISN'T IT?

I just love winter. The cold weather, the rain, the coats and scarves. The girls all dressed up. It's just great. It's my favourite time of year, and when I'm happiest. It's magical.

And no, for once I'm NOT being sarcastic.

I had a weird dream last night too. I dreamnt it was lucid, but I'm not so sure it was. I had all the limitations I normally have, difficulty controlling things, ablity to fly, and whenever I try to have sex it doesn't really work. I asked Sigmund Frued why would this be so and he didn't really give a very good answer.

It was a lot more vivid last night, sorry, I forgot it. Maybe next time.

IESSO

PS. For all my critics (there's quite a few) smoking IS cool.

CRAPPULENCE ACTUALLY MEANS DRUNKENESS, AND NOT CRAPPY, AS I PREVIOUSLY THOUGHT.

WHO: Me and Linus
WHERE: South Bank's Subway
WHY: Um, hunger! And to fill a void in our sad pathetic lives...
WHAT: Eating footlong meatball sub and crepes, waffles and icecream (one could read into the metaphor of phallic sandwhichs [if one were Fruedian minded] and chasing it with icecream... but let's not!)

Linus: If it worked for Jarrod/Jared it'll work for me...
Me: Yeah, but Jarrod/ed ate salad sandwhiches, you're eating meatball!
.....and he only ate six inch subs, yours is a footlong!
.....and he didn't have cheese, yours does!
.....and he didn't have any sauces, you have three!
Linus: (smugly) ...and I'm eating subway and so did he!

IESSO

NO GOOD CAPTION COULD BE THOUGHT OF AT THE TIME OF GOING TO PRINT...

I have a tendency to get myself into a state of stress. It normally relates to big things like life, love or relationships, or teeny-tiny things like saying the wrong thing and worry myself like crazy. This time is a combination of BIG things like life, and medium sized things like passing my classes.

I think I'm going to fail most if not all of my art theory classes. Not the end of the world you might say, but the problem is; if I fail this particular class again I will be kicked out of the degree! Which IS bad. Not only would I not graduate with all of my friends, but I won't graduate at all!

Luckily I've gotten extensions for my essays, tests and assignments, but I still am not motivated enough to actually do the work. I just can't seem to get into the zone. Or mood. Or whatever.

AND what's worse, I am looking forward to Liveworm because it's an escape from reality, from life, from my parents, from lost-love, from failing classes, from wasted opportunites and from a meaningless existence. Liveworm is not that. I shouldn't see it as that. But I do.

PS. I think I might be able to pull it off, hopefully just scraping through. But I'm REALLY stressed about it. If I seem to be rude, distracted or generally not a nice guy, please forgive me, I'm not feeling like my usual 'melancoly but still vaguely nice guy' at the moment.

PPS. I forgot to mention that I've started suffering from panic attacks! My chest hurts, I get really dizzy, and I can't breath properley. It really sucks. And I get them pretty frequently, when I'm about to fall asleep, as soon as I wake up in the morning and several times during the day. I've tried breathing deeply but it doesn't help much. Smoking helps, but the short-term benefits probably don't outweigh the long-term (what's the opposite of benefit??) bad-enefits....

PPPS. I don't ask you to feel sorry for me, but maybe cheer for me. That'd be cool. Perhaps get some Pom-poms and cheer me on. Yeah. And pleated skirts. (Now I'm going too far aren't I?)

IT'S IMPORTANT TO ASPIRE TO SOMETHING

Here's some cool photo's (in my opinion anyway) that people took of their iPods. I plan on doing the same sort of thing when the travelling begins. I don't think Brisbane has many famous landmarks. Do you?











Best sound system. EVER!

Ok, so that was a kind of pointless post, but I reckon it's cool.
IESSO

A SHORT POST OF DANGER, MYSTERY, INTRIGUE AND WOE

Actually it's just a post of woe. Horrible, horrible woe. And if you say woe enough times it loses all meaning. Woe.

Anyway I was running for the bus and dropped my iPod. Now it has a rattle inside it when you shake it and the white plastic and aluminum back don't fit together properley.

Still works though.

IESS-Woe

YOU BITCH

I know it sounds kinda mean (and this isn’t a current pattern I’ve fallen into) but…

WHERE: The bus on the way to uni
WHO: Me, a geek, and two hot girls
WHY: He was annoying

I’m watching this guy talk to these girls, who are OBVIOUSLY uncomfortable talking to this XTR3M3 G33K. They’re avoiding eye-contact, giving one-word answers to his persistant questioning, and glancing at me saying ‘HELP!’ with their eyes.

So, being the jerk of a guy I am, I say: Hey dude, I don’t mean to interrupt your conversation, but just for the record; you’re coming across kinda strong. You’re scaring the other passengers.

XTR3M3 G33K: Well I don’t mean to scare anyone. (defensively)
Me: Yeah, ok, but they’re obviously not interested.

* awkward pause *

Hot girl 1: Maybe you should tell everyone on the bus your story…

Other passengers look nervous.

The girls look at me. Say ‘thanks’ with their eyes, and get off the bus. So do I.

We all burst into laughter. And feel guilty about it. But he was obviously making everyone uncomfortable.

IESSO

PS. The domo kun iPod case is complete. Please form an orderly line if you want one. They’re $20 each. And can be made to fit any iPod, other than the iPod shuffle.

PPS. Made a few minor changes to 'The Jesus shirt' and sent it in to 'The Shirt People'. Fingers are crossed with anticipation. Which reminds me, is there just plain cipation. You'd think that you could only be 'anti-' something if that something exists....

ONCE YOU'VE HAD MAC, YOU NEVER GO BAC

I'm standing at the lights, waiting to cross the street. There is a generic older nerd guy standing next to me. He strikes up a conversation...

Generic Older Nerd: You've got an iPod huh?
Me: Yeah...
GON: Yeah, I could tell. The iconic white headphones. I heard Microsoft is realising an MP3 player to compete with Apple.
Me: Who gives a crap what Microsoft does.
GON: Uh, I do... I'm in the IT busin*
Me: That's great. I put my headphones in and walk away.

So perhaps that was a bit rude, BUT in my defense I was tired. And I'm sick of having the SAME conversation with these generic nerds. I'm glad you love your PC, but seriously, I don't care..

IESSO

PS. I am painfully aware that I am a total hypocrit.

THE LESSER OF TWO EVILS

I love my friends. They're great guys, but sometimes our relationship is bitter-sweet. Glen and Linus both are helping me redevelop my website (This very site in fact!) and have put in a fair amount of effort, time and energy. Which is really nice of them.

Unfortunately this generousity comes at a cost. Linus prefers the method of 'If I'm helping you, I can insult you...', and Glen is a bit more fun, prefering to stuff you into a recycling bin, and wheeling you around, eventually jamming you in an abandoned carpark somewhere...

Here's the photos that go along with the aforementioned story...



1. The guys working on the site. It's all fun and games until someone loses and eye.
2. Me 'helping out'.
3. I've just been called "The King of Crap!". What a nice thing to say. The eye is lost.
4. In the bin. Oscar the Grouch.
5. Riding along. Starting to get sick from the heat, bumping and lack of oxygen. And the fear.
6 - 9. Southbank after class, wasting time, waiting for the train.

Actually I'm not really upset. It was all in good fun. My friends rule.

IESSO

TIME IS A FACTOR LOIS!

I've taken the better part of two days, but I did it! It's done. I'm quite pleased. The joke may be poorly thought out, and the drawing style may be lacking, but goddamnit I like it!

It's for a t-shirt. And it's freakin' AWESOME!

I rule. You suck. Go team E. And other such cliches.

IESSO

WHEN YOU RIDE ALONE, YOU RIDE WITH HITLER!

I will not be posting too much for about a week, my laptop is in the shop being repaired. However I will sneak a few moments each day to find something silly to put up on the ol'bloggerooni. So don't worry.

I'm doing some goofy t-shirts to a) make money and b) have some fun. They're Jesus themed shirts (as per the clients requests) but they're funny... in my opinion anyway.

IESSO

rat tat tat tat tat

HOLD ME, I'M SCARED...

Do you ever feel like things happen for a reason? Or that things conspire against you, or in your favor? Or that someone is trying to tell you something? Good, uh, neither do I. But let's just say I do... this post will be a lot more interesting.

I was talking to Terry, that I randomly bumped into on the train, and he started telling me about this movie that "I should see". He said it would really make sense to me, and do me a lot of good. It's called What the Bleep Do We Know?

So I'm watching it right now. It talks about reality, and the perceptions of reality, and that we can effect our reality because it all is based on our perceptions. But without getting into specifics because a) I don't want to ruin it for you and b) I can't really explain it anyway, we'll just say that it is a good movie, and perhaps is somewhat lifechanging.

Anyway the star of the movie is a beautiful woman who is used to represent 'us'. There are sections of scientists/psychologists/physicists/religious experts explaining their theories, and then there is the beautiful woman who is our example. She's actually played by the woman in Seinfeld in the 'Lip-Reader' episode. (Her name is Marlee Martin) She's gorgeous. Her characters name is AMANDA.

I was able to look past that for a second, and continue watching the movie. Until now. The movie was really hitting a nerve, it was making a lot of sense, and it seemed to be speaking to ME. And then something scary happened. She met another character. His name is ELLIOTT.

And I can't watch it anymore. I'm scared. Is this really JUST a movie that was randomly suggested, or is there a force behind it? And is that force external or internal? Do I want to get better so much that I caused reality to line up and send me a message?

Or is it all a series of coincidences?

IESSO

UM, YOU KNOW, THAT GUY WITH THE WIG?

Talking with my mom about the 100 most influential people in history.

ME: Yeah Benjamin Franklin would be on the list...
MOM: What about that guy?
ME: George Washington?
MOM: Nah, not him, the other guy...
ME: Thomas Jefferson?
MOM: Yeah that's the one!

Also:

MOM: There's so stuff to make a salad. There's some lettuce and a tomato, and, uh that orange one...
ME: Carrot?
MOM: Yeah.

IESSO

DEATH OF A SALESMAN

Talking with Arron (the crazy bastard!)

Elliott: I'll give you $100 to kill me...
Arron: Just $100? No, that's too little. I'll have to carry the burden of telling your family. I'll feel guilty for the rest of my life.
Elliott: Oh come on dude, all you have to do is push me in front of a bus.
Arron: It's not worth it. I can work for one day, and I can make more than that.

Talking about suicide:
Arron: I can't kill myself... my mom cares about me so much.

IESSO

PS. Tried to get Arron to pose in a photo pretending to kill me, but he refused. He doesn't want to go to jail.

Meggles Eggles

In case you wanted to see what I've been doing at Liveworm; here it is! In all it's glory. Egg carton packaing. The most (least) exciting thing EVER! Actually it's not too bad, but it's not really that great either. I'm gonna do a bunch of different versions, but this is what I've done so far.

The new design should be ready soon, Glen is working on it as we speak. What a champion!

IESSO

I DID IT!

1000
Originally uploaded by Elliott Scott.

I made it to my goal! 1000 visitors. Actually I probably contributed a lot to that number, but the victory is still sweet.

Ok, I'd better keep working.

Nah, time for a celebratory dance first.

There we go, now it's time for work.


IESSO

OOPS, YOU CAUGHT ME!

I'm working at Liveworm now. It's the uni's in-house design studio. It's going pretty good so far. I've designed the print for an egg carton, and a website as well. And now I'm 'taking a break'.

I probably won't be able to post as much stuff for a while, but to compensate I'm redesigning the look of the blog. It's gonna be awesome! And you can't spelt awesome without AW. And you know what else you can't spell without AW? Awful.

IESSSO

JOURNALS: THE BLOGS OF A YEAR AGO

I haven't written in my journal for a while. I'd been meaning to get back into it, but it was just easier typing that drawing a picture. So I put it off.

I was listening to A Soldering Life by The Decemberists. The song is kinda about a battle, and your trenchmate. I thought it was a good metaphor for life. Or more specifically picking up chicks in clubs. You've got your trenchmate and you're armed with a rifle and a grenade (and a handgun [hee hee hee]) and you're sent into battle. You face your mortal enemy; the self-righteous chick or rejection (whichever one is worse) and you do your best not to get shot.

Some people say it's fun to cruise for chicks. I couldn't think of anything less fun. It's horrible. I'm vulnerable, there are bombs going off in the distance, barbed wire all over the place, and victory is nowhere in sight.

I gotta get me a flesh would so I can go to the infirmary and talk to the gentle, kind, beautiful nurses. Who are on my side.

So anyway, this picture is a sketch I did tonight. It's me and my trenchmate Dermot. He got shipped to a different battlefield, but I still remember some silly times we had. Unfortunately I don't have any trenchmates left, and the battle is a lot harder and less fun to fight alone.

If you wanna see some of my other journal entries, click HERE. WARNING: It's kinda 'lost love' themed. I was sad at the time.

ALSO: Check out this goofy rabbit comic I did ages ago. It's silly and makes little-to-no-sense. Eyeroll factor 10! Click HERE
Sgt I. Esso

OR DID YOU THINK I WAS TOO STUPID TO KNOW WHAT A U-GOOGLY-WAS?

I had a really weird dream last night/this morning when I was sneaking some ZZzzzz's (for secret sleeping!)

It was completely mundane, and trivial. I woke up. Blah blah usual stuff. And I went to uni. I caught the train up and the whole bit. It was so normal and everyday-like that I actually didn't realise I was dreaming. It seemed like I was awake... So the next part seemed real too...

I get to uni, everyone I know is pannicking. (By the way the uni is now at the Gabba [the football stadium]) I follow the crowds to some sort of mass assembly. It's like high school. Someone is talking. Nobody is listening though. I move down the bleachers from the nosebleed section to the front. Elvira is trying to give a speech, but nobody is listening. She's crying/weeping and it makes me start to cry/weep. I listen to what she's saying and it makes me even more sad. Someone we know has died.

I leave with Elvira who has given up on her eulogy. No-one seemed to care. We pass Glen in the corridors. He looks a bit different but its him I guess, and he's upset too. Everyone was upset, but its was a chaotic sorrow, rather than calm and organised sorrow, which is obviously totally expected!

Anyway, I'm glad you're okay Linus. You are ok right? WHY WON'T YOU ANSWER ME?
oh, I hadn't posted this yet.... heh heh heh. Nevermind.

ALSO: In a DIFFERENT dream I was doing something or other, watching TV I guess and I kept hearing this line:
I have travelled to the ends of the Earth, and no-where do I know more that you are my one true love.
Have you heard that before? Where from? I don't think it even makes sense. Or at least it's not really saying anything. Is the focus of the sentence that the person loves the other one a lot, or that the place is really great?

Weird.

IESSO

PS. Watch 'The Cell', you might get an idea what it's like to dream for me. Nah, just kidding. But watch it anyway!

CANCER COMES IN STICK FORM NOW?

I shouldn't smoke. I don't think cancer sounds like a lot of fun. I don't really mind dying a decade younger, but the suffering from whatever form of cancer I'll get isn't sounding too good to me right now.

BUT it's just sssoooo good. Yes I admit I'm addicted to them, but I aslo enjoy them. Yes I'm just convincing myself that the habit is okay, and it's not. But I don't really want to quit right now. If I had a girlfriend who wanted me to stop I probably would. My friends want me to stop, and for a few weeks I did, but I started again... sorry guys.

Anyway the point is, sometimes when I run out of cigarettes I'll find one in the bottom of my backpack that's all mushed up. And I'll wrap it in photocopy paper to smoke it. But the glues in the paper or something make me feel sick. And dizzy.

And that was an entirely pointless post. But the image is of Lord Kitchener borrowed from a poster used by the English to get people to enlist in World War 1. He's the Uncle Sam of England, only he was a real person.



IESSO

A POST SANDWICH

3 Posts for the price of none

1. T-shirts are back.



This one makes fun of kids like me who want to be muso's but really ain't. I can't play guitar, I have no ear for music, I can't keep a beat and my timing is always way off. I can't even play air guitar. I but I have no hesitations to wear a shirt with a guitar on it. This one has a rad disclaimer showing that I ain't no poser, I just like guitars. BOOYAH! Check out the neat custom logo. It sucks.

2. Uping the ante: I've increased my medication dosage from 50mg per day to a whopping 100mg. Dunno what that means, but it'll hopefull help me. Plus I've got to go see a psychiatrist. WOOT! Yay for mental illnesses!

3. To quote my former boss, and then me in a class discussion:



This one was done with Linus in mind. What a champion. Poor guy had his social life ruined by yours truly, then he was in a car accident yesterday (he's ok) and now this. Maybe the sarcasm will make him feel better. I might print one out and put it on a shirt for him. Then he can either wear it or burn it.

That's all for today, more shirts coming soon. YAY!

IESSO

DON'T LET ME TALK ANYMORE

I just screwed up again. A friend of mine likes another friend of mine and for ages they've not being taking an active stance. I thought I would help out a bit and speed things up by getting them to go on a double date. Which is in theory a good idea, perhaps, but not when only one of the friends likes the other. So instead of being helpful I've just made things awkward and annoying. Maybe I shouldn't stick my nose into other people's business. That might be a good idea to try out.

To my friend: I'm really really sorry for putting you in a situation that isn't pleasant and for causing a chain of events ending in your heartbreak.

I promise to never try this sort of thing again. EVER.

Elliott

BEST MSN CONVESATION EVER

WHO: Elvira and me
WHEN: Just now dummy
THE PLAYERS:
[-_-]: Elvira VS Sigh-ber Spaced: Me

Sigh-ber Spaced says: (9:03:31)
seriously. when i was having my lucid dreams more regularely, i tried getting that to happen, a threesome, and thats what they did, they got bored and left. none of that semi-lesbian fun, no way, they started reading boooks and stuff

Sigh-ber Spaced says: (9:03:45)
even in my dreams im crap in bed. hooray!
ps. i dont know if im actually crap in bed, but i assume i am

Sigh-ber Spaced says: (9:04:47)
hmm,... why did i just tell you that? hooray! too much information!

[-_-] says: (9:05:18)
i think i have already heard

[-_-] says: (9:05:24)
its alll good

Sigh-ber Spaced says: (9:05:42)
who did you hear that from? i hope it was from me
cuz i dont remember sleeping with anyone you know...

[-_-] says: (9:05:57)
ur blog

Sigh-ber Spaced says: (9:06:01)
ok, good

[-_-] says: (9:06:07)
stress less

Sigh-ber Spaced says: (9:06:14)
you got my hopes up there for a minute

Sigh-ber Spaced says: (9:07:16)
did you see the latest Burnt Face Man episode. funny shit
theyre getting better each time

[-_-] says: (9:07:44)
not lately

[-_-] says: (9:07:48)
he rocks

Sigh-ber Spaced says: (9:08:00)
best line in #2: I'm not gay... I've got a calendar of naked women... up... at home

[-_-] says: (9:08:29)
no - "its ok be be go eat some cheese"

Sigh-ber Spaced says: (9:09:44)
yeah thats good too

Sigh-ber Spaced says: (9:10:15)
well what does that say about us? im a closest gay person, and youre a compulsive over eater......
lets never analyse things again

[-_-] says: (9:10:32)
well yeah lets not

RECIPE FOR SUCCESS: Cooper Black, American Typewriter, Little Icons and a SICK sense of humour

I don't like my depression brochure. Much too serious for my likings. Well actually I'm quite pleased with it, BUT I wish I could write my own brochure. I'd make it VERY dark humorous. Egg I'd have 10 things to think about before you pull the trigger (or whatever other method you'd use.

1. Think about what you're gonna wear. This is how your friends will find you. So maybe it'd be best to wear a poncho. It's very cruel for you to make your friends see you in such a state, let alone in messy clothes.

2. Your parents are going to have to pay for a funeral. Are they able to come with the money straight away. Maybe you should wait until it's less of a financial burden on them.

3. - 10. Etc.

I know I'd never get away with it, but I might present the idea anyway, and see what the kids say. I know everyone is gonna hate it, but hopefully they'll chuckle a bit too. Shameful laughing is the best form of laughing! WOOT!

IESSO

PS. I've got a license to make these kinds of jokes. Just as I am allowed to make Jewish jokes, or Nazi jokes, but it's totally uncool and VERY offensive for you (probably) to. Ah hypocriticsm, its awesome!

PPS. Check out my OTHER blog. Laney Bloggs.

SAD BUNNY'S & NAKED WOMEN

I took a Rorschach inkblot test over the interweb today. Very interesting stuff. 56 questions so the results have to be accurate. It was a lot of fun.

THE RESULTS: My subconcious is driven by IMAGINATION. Such a nicer result than 'Emotional instability' like the personality test I took a while ago. Remember that?

If you want to take the Rorschach test, click HERE
or the women's personality test (I took it anyway), click HERE

Post your results up here if you want.
IE220

GRIFFICINE

A REDELOPMENT OF AN OLD CONCEPT: It's not so much an insult to the medical department or students studying medicine at Griffith as it is an insult to the university in general. Let's be honest; the medical department of Griffith is a joke. Would YOU trust a doctor that studied at Griffith Upstairs Medical School? I didn't think so! AND medicine is supposed to be the best degree, with highest standards. So it's all downhill from there baby!

ALSO: I've got a big long story about last night, but I'm too tired to write it up right now. Suffice to say it's got everything; Rejections in love, drunken stupor, overpriced drinks and sleeping on a bench in the rain. HOORAY! Watch this space for a further update and some filling in of some details.

IE220

PS. I'm sorry if this image offends. If it's any consolation I censored some stuff out of it. Relax, and learn to like it.

THE TRADITION IS ALIVE AND KICKING

Every year for the last 7 years she has wished me a happy birthday. Some years more enthusiastic than others obviously. I was VERY suprised to hear from her this year. I haven't spoken to her an at least 6 months. I was wondering if she'd send me a message. I'm glad she did. But of course it brought back a lot of sad memories.

Damn me and my bitter-sweet outlook on life.

IE22O

BIRTHDAYBOY

No seriously, if you can think of a better way to commemorate your own birthday I'd like to hear it!?

GUM?

My iPod shuffle skin arrived today. It's really cool. It makes the shuffle look like a packet of Wrigley's Doublemint Gum. And it's custom ordered with my name on it. SWEET. It's funny though, the shuffle weighs so little normally that you can actually feel weight difference with a sticker on it. And it feels thicker. It's a friggin sticker!

id est SSO

FIRE AND BRIMSTONE KEEP ME WARM AT NIGHT

The-Devil
Originally uploaded by Elliott Scott.

HA HA HA! IN YOUR FACE CRITICS! I've got some pretty powerful readers. Take a lot at this webcounter screenshot for proof. Of what exactly I'm not so sure, but proof of something EVIL I'll bet.

I'm Elliott Scott, not REALLY in cohoots with the Devil it was all a coincidence, but you could have figured that out by yourself, signing off.

WHEN IN DOUBT, BUY A WOMANS SUIT

STOP! If you haven't seen Napolean Dynamite, don't even keep reading this, and go watch it. NOW! Times-a-wasting!

Ok, so I am posting this in response to a post from my friend/arch rival Linus and his post on his blog (which is better than mine) and his review of the movie. I REALLY liked it, and he didn't see what all the hype was about. Ok sure, he can have his opinions. But they're wrong. The movie is seriously funny. It may be dry, slow-paced and overall empty but that's its appeal. Hilarity in mondaynity. I mean mundanity.

Good characters. No plot. No real morals other than the obvious 'be who you are and don't let others tell you who you should be' type moral that runs through all nerd movies.
BEST LINES: "Ugh! *big sigh, eye-roll* Idiots!"
BEST CHARACTER: Kip, the loser brother.


Other films i recommend are:
- The Royal Tenebaums
- Lost in Translation
- American Splendor
- Adaptation
all of them are movies about nothing, but have some good characters. Lost in T may be a bit different, not as quirky, but I like it. Adaptation is more plot based, but damn it was good.

Thats my two cents. And like another buck fitty.
IESSO

I'M BACK BABY! AND LOVIN EVERY MINUTE OF IT!

Today's my dad's birthday. I got him some stuff he likes. Which was lucky. To thank me he gave me a good handshake. BUT it was one of those homie-G handshakes that go on for too long. Plus it was my dad. Odd. Where does he get these things from? Certainly not from me.

Went to Brisbania yesterday to go to a comedy show with Linus. Funny funny stuff. Daniel Kitson was the comic. He quite hilarious, and not like most other acts. No sex jokes, rather dry witty jokes about Scrabble and word-play. HOORAY! ok, so that doens't sound exciting but it was.

I missed the last train home last night. A mild disaster. No seriously, it's a lot worse than it sounds. I was literally stranded in Brisbane with 4 choices.
1. Catch a train to Beenleigh and pray that Tanner could pick me up.
2. Call Linus and crash at his place.
3. Meander the streets for 6 hours until the first train in the morning.
4. Call my ex-girlfriend who lives walking distance from the city and crash at her place. Maybe I could share her bed or something.

Guess what I did?


Also when I finally got home I checked my email and then my computer crashed. I've loaded the new Mac operating system on it now instead, and it runs great. Those widgets for Tiger work really really good. VERY useful indeed.

IESSO