IN THE NAVY

ivi092_editedResized
Originally uploaded by Elliott Scott.

Here is a photo of Tanner at work. You gotta admire his enthusiasm.

YES MEN

I need your opinion on something VERY important. We've got to put something in the graduate catalog and I had submittted the sample included a few posts ago (The Catalog/Catalogue), but seeing everyone elses mine looks kind dull and mundane [no, not mondayne, for that would have been awesome of course!] So I redesigned some of it and came up with this. What do you guys think? Ignore the images of course, they'll be the same as before, these were the only versions I had on my laptop and not the work computer. Anyway do you like the comic style? Is it too cluttered? I guess it's hard to tell without looking at the other peoples images on the same page as me. There is one that is TOTALLY eye-catching, it pisses me off. Well not really, more like worried and insecure.

Anyway if you could give me an opinion in either the form of yes or no, or some sort of easy to do adjustment that'd be great. Come on guys at uni, help me out! I know we're competing, but your work is surely better than mine anyway, give a guy a break. I'd also like to hear from the non-designer type people like Tanner, Elliott 2, Angry (if you're still out there), Benji, Louise, Sars and anyone else out there who reads this at least once in a while. Your opinions really mean a lot to me!

IESSO

PS. A special request for opinion goes out to my spiritual guide and design hero; Dermo, if you're reading this, please gimme some feedback!



Well, because the feedback has been overwhelmingly negative aggainst the textured background I got rid of it. And it looks better. Thanks guys. Whoever said you were all a bunch of idiots was dead wrong. I changed the images in the boxes too to give a better indication of the final version. THANKS AGAIN!



Here's what it looks like in the spread. See why I was so worried? Your eyes are totally drawn to the girl on the yellow BG first! Oh the stress! The competition! Anyone who thinks design is easy is obviously not aware of all the in-fighting, competition and personal struggles. Sure we don't really have tests, and you don't have to be particularly smart, but there is a lot to think about, and you do need to be good with numbers and really exact with measurements. And pretty colors, of course.



Linus, you're right. Once again. This is better huh?

Dermo: I don't want you to think that I'm disregardingg your comment about putting in only the sprocket head, but it seems like EVERYONE is putting in snazzy vector graphics. I wanted somethign to distinguish myself from everyone else, despite doing nothing but vector graphics myself; hence the comic theme.

*** Ooops, just noticed the error caused by decreasing the line thickness in the purple box. I've fixed it up, but didn't bother updating the image. Problem solvered.

THE TIME HAS COME, THE WALRUS SAID, TO TALK OF MANY THING, OF SHOES AND SHIPS AND SEALING WAX - OF CABBAGES AND KINGS

Alice in Wonderland is a great story. One of my all-time favourites, but thats beside the point. My laptop has decided to sh*t itself. I think it's that time of year, a lot of people's having been doing this recently, both Mac and PC. Already on my list of problems was the harddrive not working at 100% so it runs nice and slow, but also the power connection is dodgy so I get shocked a lot AND most recently the wireless receiver doesn't work, so I can't use the internet at my house without major dramas. Any one of those things I can live with, two even, but not all three! I'm gonna back everything up (that's if my DVD burner which needed to be replaced 3 times already decides to work!) and then I'm gonna wipe it all, take it into the shop and let them fix it!

Despite all this I am still pro-Mac. I think it's partly due to the customer service at my local store, but hey, it's all part of the package baby!

I'm hoping to upgrade the "it's not the size that matters" 12in laptop to the top of the line "hung like a mule" 17in laptop. I know, I know, I'm over-compensating, but so what? I've gone blind using what I've got... we're still talking about computers so stay focused... so I think it's about time for a bigger screen, faster processor, more RAM and a big boost to all the other acronym parts as well!

IESSO

PS. I was dead tired today, and feeling woozy, but now I'm freakishly awake and it's pissing me off.
PPS. My phone ALSO died today. The buttons don't work (I think I wrote this in the post below) so I had to dig up an old backup phone. Which I think was from 1998? It's huge! Green and black screen, no phonic, so hard to use! Menu systems? what the hell is that?!

CRAZY-LONG, CRAZY POST DAY

FRONT/OUTSIDE





BACK/INSIDE

Here is the QCA Exhibition invite flyer I'm working on. They friggin better use it, I've spent ages on it and my computer kept crashing because the file was so complex and I have been stressing out to the max, so they had better use it if they know what good for them!

I was asked why I choose to use a high-heel shoe instead of something more blokey like an army boot? Well, I don't know. Maybe its cuz thats insane! No, I don't know. I'm not a bloke I guess (although I don't wear high heels either) but yeah, army boots are too angry and intense, and not as strange for a giraffe to be wearing.

A quick note about colors: The pink is supposed to be an intense flourescent red/orange, but for some reason the screen can't reproduce those colors well (don't ask me why) so it looks like this. Think intense mind-melting, eye-bleeding colors and you'll understand what it's supposed to be. Freakin awesome!

ALSO had a crazy day today, didn't sleep much last night and was tired and fell asleep under my desk at work, and at the back as well. And I'm supposed to get paid for the logo I did but haven't so far and they had better not be trying to rip me off or I will kill them. Kill them all!

And my phone is broken so I can't type SMS's, which is stupid and annoying and I can't dial any numbers with 6 in it! So that too is crazy and annoying.

So this post makes no sense but I really am not in the mood to fix it. Kind of cross between really tired, preoccopied with thoughts about uni, work, money and the unamed girl. CRAZY! as well as getting sick. HOORAY!

Anyway I think these images will work in your browser, but if they dont let me know I'm I'll fix them up.

IESSO

OLD SCHOOL

I've got an assignment to come up with a logotype for a recruitment agency in the media industry. Aside from the actual logo (which isn't my personal favourite) the clients did something totally awesome, they wanted some changes, bit and peices from each of the concepts, and in the email they said they cut and pasted around, but I didn't think they meant this:



Also, there is this mysterious gas station near Harbor Town. It's really strange, no-one is ever there, there isn't a place to pay, only an ATM and it's always surrounded by blackness. I think of it as an island of light, in a sea of blackness... um.. well I do!



I concede that this image MAY have been photoshopped a little bit. But only to enhance the island of light-titude of the image.

I'm Elliott Scott, who may have been enhanced in photoshop, signing off.

YOU JUST DON'T GET IT, DO YOU?

On the train there are two kids playing 'Eye Spy', one of them doesn't quite grasp the concept.

Harrison: I spy with my little... something beginning with big.
Jordan: No, you have to say "I spy with my little EYE"
Harrison: I spy with my little something beginning with green!
Jordan: {sigh}... that book over there?
Harrison: No...
Jordan: Umm... Mum?
Harrison: No...
{5-10 minutes pass of Jordan guessing incorrectly over and over again}
Jordan: Is it that house?
Harrison: Um, yes.
Jordan: But you didn't see that house when we started playing.
Harrison: I spy with my little...

Poor little Harrison, he's not so bright.

ALSO

Check out the bestest and greatest website EVER! It's a bit slow, so if you're still stuck in 1995 (dial-up) you might have to give it a miss, or not appreciate it's full awesomenitude. Click HERE! My favourites are the Designer Republic and the Rex & Tannat McKay bottles

Here's an enticing screenshot! It rules, but the individual bottles kick some major design ass. Vector art at its best.



IESSO

THE CATALOG / CATALOGUE

So we get a massive 125x105mm to showcase ourselves in this years graduate catalog. I seriously doubt my self and the crappy work I do, but was forced to put something in, and this is what I've come up with. I dunno. My friends say it's good, but I don't think so. The problems I have with it, aside from the dismal work quality is that it's too narrow a scope of my skill set, I"m not just an illustrator, although I certainly do enjoy that stuff best, but I also can do layout work and ... um... typography? Well maybe not, but I don't like putting myself into a category.



I do like this photo of me! It's also going in the catalog as my profile shot. Although without the blueness or the swirls, but it's till cool. You will like it too. On the count of three you will do exactly as I say.... 1....2....3.....

IESSO

3 PART POST

REENFORCING STEREOTYPES

Two people got off the train in front of me, one was a business man; suit, tie, briefcase, etc, the other was a rough-type with peircings, a shabby beard and smelled of rum. The business man accidentally bumped into the rough guy. Without missing a beat or saying a word he beat the business man up. He beat the living crap out of him, punching him over and over in the face and when the guy fell down he kicked him in the stomach. I was stunned. I wanted to help but I couldn't, I'm not strong and this guy would have beaten the shit out of me too. He kept yelling "Have respect for other people!" over and over as he was unrelentlessly hitting the business man.

And to make matters worse the security gaurds didn't do anything except stand on the train and watch. It was not a good scene.

I'm still quite shocked about the whole thing, not really beleiving it happened. That kind of thing doesn't happen in Helensvale. It shouldn't even happen anywhere, the business man slightly bumped the rough guy, and he didn't even get a chance to apologise. It's not like he pushed him out of the way and didn't say anything. I dunno.

KUNG-FU HUSTLE

Speaking of random acts of violence...
Linus had some friend around last night for a Kung-Fu marathon. It was fun, you totally missed out. We ate Mexican food and watched Kung-Fu movies. Some were good, some were not. We then watched Harvey Birdman cartoons, which were hilarious!

OTHER LESS VIOLENT AND MORE SILLY THINGS:

1. Why are 'ladies of the night' and 'creatures of the night' so very different?

2. If talent scouts find talented people of various feilds (ie, sports) why don't boy scouts or girl scouts search for little boys and girls?

3. Next time someone says that you can't see air, point at the sky. The blueness is caused because the air reflects the gamut of color from white light sans the blue wavelength. And the reason it looks like a shell is because we're looking at air. But I guess you sort of already knew that one. Point is: you can totally see the air.

IESSO

PS. The performance-blog that I mentioned earlier is now up and running: Error404:Mondayne. There is only one post up there at the moment, but you can check it out once in a while and get a disturbing insight into my sad and pathetic life. HA HA! Melancoly!
The address is www.error404-mondayne.blogspot.com

WOODY ALLEN

I've gotten into Woody Allen films recently, sure they're kinda bizarre/old-fashioned/hip-to-be-squareish and all that, but they're also funny. Check out Annie Hall for seriousness and Play It Again Sam for humour. Best line from the latter:

WOODY ALLEN: That's quite a lovely Jackson Pollock, isn't it?
GIRL IN MUSEUM: Yes it is.
WA: What does it say to you?
GIM: It restates the negativeness of the universe, the hideous lonely emptiness of existence, nothingness, the predicament of man forced to live in a barren, godless eternity, like a tiny flame flickering in an immense void, with nothing but waste, horror, and degradation, forming a useless bleak straightjacket in a black absurd cosmos.
WA: What are you doing Saturday night?
GIM: Committing suicide.
WA: What about Friday night?
GIM: [leaves silently]

+ the obligatory sexual quote:
WOODY ALLEN: I wonder if she even had an orgasm over the entire two years we were married? Or did she fake it that time?

Brilliant.

IESSO

ALL-NATURAL, EXTRA-SWEET ASIAN-PUNK-CAVEMAN JUICE

I bought this fruit and vegetable juice the other day, which by the way was pretty good but it had a strange marketting tool, on the side was a dude with the craziest costume ever, he was punk and caveman combined. It was weird. If only I could speak Taiwanese I could understand what it was all about, but just looking at it, it makes no sense.

I'm Elliott Scott, appearing somewhat racist on the surface, but deep down not really, just niaive and shallow; signing off.

PS. The photos dont do justice to the craziness of the image. The guy has a crazy hair style and is wearing fur clothes with a bone and tooth necklace. CRAZY! Good juice though!

KNEE ON LIGHTS

Lame lame lame. Anyway went for a bit of a cruise in Lindseys new car (Lindsey is the guy on the right, other guy is Tanner), and not being much of a car person I took photos. We went through Surfers and I took some photos of the lights. I like lights. I love lamp. Shiny bright pretty colors. Ooohhh. Aaaah. And this is the worlds worst collage from said photos. The camera has a really small lense which requires long exposure times to capture the light, hence the blurriness. Plus the car was totally shaking. Gimme a break. You guys are WAY too judgmental.

Later on in the night we were invited to someones birthday party. I think it was a friends friends sisters birthday. Oh man it was an awkward situation; Sweet 16. We're 22 by the way... so it was not cool. Luckily there were other people our age and the girls could do there thing while we were in the living room playing cards. So it was all ok. I didn't get arrested.

Oh an also the 16 year old boys were funny, they kept shaking our hands, I guess because they were trying to be men, and that's what men do. But holy crap they had weak handshakes. It was funny. I know it's silly but I totally judge a person based on their handshake, its got to be just right or I don't trust them. These kids were limp-wristed and weak... they must have been intimidated by my awesomeness and rugged masculine manliness or something equally as bizarre.

Um... yeah, I'll just quit while I'm ahead on this topic.
IESSO

WHAT? ME TIRED?

See the thing about yesterday was that when I left for work at 7am I had already been awake for 20 hours, so it was bound to be a long day.

I went out on a nice date with UNG, and we had fun and it was nice and intimate at the place we went to (Garuva: They had indoor tents! and we had cake and icecream and Mai Tais' for dinner!!) and it was nice. But then we caught the train home(s). Which was ok in theory, we had to cut the night short because she had to be home at a certain time, which is fine I guess, but whatever. We caught the 9.30 all-stops train to Beenleigh with her needing to get off at one of the stations before that...

We were going fine untill we got to Kuraby. Apparently one of the powerlines snapped and the train could go no further. We had to exit the train and wait in the cold (good snuggling opportunity) for 40 minutes. It was also raining.

40 minutes later the train arrived. We got on. There was another 20 minute delay on the tracks while they switched tracks or something. We finally got going, she got to her stop, got off and got home (1 1/2 hours late!) I stayed on, passed another station and was delayed again, luckily for only 10-15 minutes.



These photo's were taken after UNG got off the train and I was bored/tired. I'm more pretending to be annoyed than actually being annoyed. Why? To create 'atmosphere' and 'tension' of course. Sexual tension; naturally.

I finally got home at 12.15 and was freakin tired. 37 hours of being awake kills me. Especially when it's freakin cold and raining and I am not looking forward to walking for 45 minutes in said conditions. I asked few people for rides, no such luck and walked home. Some people had a change of heart and drove out of their way to give me a ride. So nice of them. It was warm and comfy in the car and I got home at 12.30. Cool.

So overall a grand adventure. I had a lot of fun. Despite the crazy circumstances. Point being: If I was alone this adventure would have sucked! It's amazing how much of a difference another person can make. Awesome.

IESSO

Ps. I got a few emails from people:

Dermo sent me a link to this dude who is way disgruntled with society but entirely funny. Check out his homepage HERE or my favourite page HERE, which is him trash-talking artwork by children. Don't worry, he gives them a fair grade ranging from A to F, so it's not entirely without merit.

Someone else sent me an email 'letting me know' that he used my artwork in a magazine. Which was flattering, but also kinda strange becuase he didn't actually ask to use it. You can download it for yourself HERE.

For the record, that's 3 people in the last week asking to use photos I uploaded onto Stock.xchange. Which is cool, but strange becuase A) Why all of the sudden? and B) They're sh*tty photo's anyway.

THORPEY SAYS IT'S FULLY SICK!

It is totally awesome when your crappy work makes the leap from crappy InDesign/Illustrator/Photoshop file to actual crapy flesh and blood [ok; paper] products! YAY! 'Specially when they're fun things like Murtle the Turtle for the EPA! I can't wait for the t-shirts to be printed. They will rock!

IESSO

I HEART LUCY

Let's talk LUCID DREAMING again. It's been a hell of a long time since my last post about them, and coincidentally a long time since I had one, weird huh? Anyway I had one last night. Well actually this morning, but whatever....

Firstly it started off as standard dream (weird but me not having any control) I was in charge of screening A Life Aquatic to a test audience and disaster ensued; the audience was a bunch of hillbillies and didn't care about the movie, I think there was a war or something, none of the technical equipment worked, etc etc..

Yeah there was a war, NO, wait it was a horse race, but it was in apalling conditions, I ended up dragging the horse through the snow and rain and sleet over the line... And because I was dragging it I ended up grinding it away, as well as my hands (but luckily it was too cold for me to feel pain, or care) and that's when I realised I was dreaming. I did my standard test; flying, and it worked real well. I'm totally getting better at flying. And I can totally get the texture of objects right, but the storylines are still uncontrolable.

In fact they were so uncontrollable that I gave up doing whatever it was I was doing and went home. Except that it was my old home in WA and that it was now in Tuscany.. Anyway I told my parents that I was dreaming and they wouldn't believe me. I kept doing cool things to prove to them; like flying, making money appear and controlling their movements but they didn't really understand. They kept asking me if I woke up would I still be able to make money? I told them now was their chance to do cool things too, but they weren't interested.

I told my brother all this as well and he was excited. And for some reason we ended up getting the hillbillies to watch Life Aquatic and Bill Murray was really happy.

Then I heard footsteps and woke up.
Pretty crazy huh? Anyone wanna interpret that? No? Well ok...

IESSO

PS. For those who care: WHAT I HAD FOR DINNER LAST NIGHT:
- Ham + Cheese Sandwich
- Knackwerst + Saurkraut
- Leftover Curry
- 2 x Bannana muffins
- Apple Juice
- LOADS of sugar during the day! LOADS!

PPS> No, I'm not randomly listing what I ate, I had this theory that the food you eat effects and/or affects your dreams. Well it's not my theory actually, but I can't remember whose it was, so it might as well have been mine. Yeah, that's right!

PPPS. While trying to find a good image of a stripper (see comments to understand why I'm doing this) I found a site where you can hire male strippers and then perform sexual favours on them. Now call me crazy, or old-fashioned but A) Isn't that kinda weird, fellating a stranger in front of other girls B) Aren't some of the girls in relationships [LIKE THE BRIDE-TO-BE], C) It seems kind of unhygenic and lastly and most importantly D) How does that sound like fun? Again call me crazy, and in no way do I not think it's a great concept for people to 'give this little acts of love' or even lust, but the person GIVING is the one doing the work, not the person RECIEVING... These dudes are being paid in more ways than one. I don't understand... No mutual gain in any way... clearly I don't really have any idea what I'm talking about, but it seems like it would be a lot of work...

PPPPPS. I totally had a link to the site but I took it down because I didn't want to been seen endorsing such a site, which for the record I don't, and off the record I also don't... so if you happened to see my site and follow the link before I removed it, and were offended, despite my warnings, I am sorry. Oh and also.. you are an idiot. I told you it was material of a sensitive nature and that you wouldn't want to see it... but no, you didn't listen did you?

ONLY IN AMERICA, or quite possibly Canada...

We took the Cola Challenge!!!!! today with unsuprising results. The glasses were filled with cola and the names of the contents hidden from us. We were told to fill out a peice of paper saying which was which, and sure enough we were 100% correct. Coke was my preferred choice, while my dad liked Pepsi, but regardless of preference we knew exactly which was which. Pepsi is sweeter than coke, but less fizzy, and both are sweeter and have more flavour and carbonation than the generica 'Brand X' cola.

I was actually quite suprised though, the difference between Coke and Pepsi aren't as obvious as I thought. It really depends on which one you drink first. I drank Pepsi first so initially Coke seemed sweeter, but after later tasting I settled on my final and correct answer.

So there you go. Total losers. It's awesome!

IESSO

PS. I'm sorry I haven't posted so much as of late, in case you hadn't realised I haven't been feeling so cheerful this last week. I'm not sure why, but yeah, not the best... So I haven't really done anything worthy of publishing (other than this AWESOME challenge of course) Hopefully next week will be better. PPS. Totally pissed Sebastian off this week because of my poor attendance at work [2 days off, late 2 days, still have friday to go] HUZZAH!

PPPS. I'm once again the veiwer of the 1000th ... um... thingo? Anyway, YAY! 5000! That's like half a million right?! WOW. Although I must confess that I did add to that number; everytime I upload, modify or delete something from the site the number goes up... so it's really about 4500, but don't tell anyone...

IN MY DEFENCE

A quick word about the new look; "Why so feminine?" you might ask, to which I would reply'; "Why not?" ... oh and also I just watched an episode of Changing Rooms, so my mind has melted.

POST 450, the cop-out post

I keep having nightmares. Every time I've gone to sleep for the last 4-5 nights I've woken up in terror. It's not fun. Any suggestions? Explanations?

IESSO?

PS. I think my parents are going crazy. They seem to have lost the sense of 'appropriate time'. If they have a thought, they say it, no matter when it is, or how annoying it is because they've already said fifty things. Case in point; I went home yesterday early because I wasn't feeling well and as soon as I stepped in the door my parents asked if I wanted panadol, food, drink, anything, 'no thanks, i just want to go to sleep', they asked me again if i wanted things, told me about their day and generally stopped me from sleeping. That's fine I guess, at least they care about me, but when I finally fell asleep, there was a knock at the door, my mom told me she bought some ham for lunches. Yeah, cool, but maybe it could wait till morning?

PPS. I checked my listings with Technorati. I'm ~#255,000th best web log in the world! YAY? So maybe if you like my site, link to here and let me know you've done so, so I can send you your bribe money. Thanks.

TAKE ME OUT TO THE BALL GAME

Here are the photo's from our day of baseballing fun. I had to sort of pick and choose what goes in, and what gets the boot, so please feel free to kick my lily ass. I selected photos based on visual appearance and content. Blah blah blah.

It's kinda late, I think I might get some sleep. See ya'll.

I'm Elliott Scott, who somehow affects a southern drawl when he's tired, signing off.

PS. Yes, I totally throw like a girl. And a wussy, limp-wristed girl at that!

EARTH, FIRE, WIND, WATER.... oh and heart too...

Ok, so most of you might not know but Linus and I are big Captain Planet fans. Well as much as one can be in this day and age. You know what I'm talking about right? Captain Planet, big blue guy with a green mullet, 'Our powers combine', etc etc...

Anyway I somehow followed the links to the CP site on IMDB and guess what? There were some pretty big (relatively) actors of the time doing voices for the show. And here I am thinking it was some B-Grade obscure TV show. NOPE! Check out these names:

LeVar Burton (of Star Trek fame [the guy with the glasses!])
Whoopi Goldberg
Ed Asner
Ed Begley Jr
James Coburn
Tim Curry
Phyllis Diller
Danny Glover
Jeff Goldblum
Helen Hunt
Meg Ryan
Martin Sheen
Jessica Simpson
and MORE!

Ok, so some of those names are not entirely huge, but they were! I think the phrase 'icon fused' applies now more than any other time in human history. Yep. That's right. Follow the links to the IMDB page, maybe the images will refresh your memories of who these crazy cats are.

4 Years

Being September 11th I thought I might say a few words. Hurricane Katrina was was horrible too, but being a natural disaster it's a bit harder to blame a specific person. But that's not what I'm about here; blaming, no, I just wanted to say that despite the risks of life and limb, either from Al Queda, other extremist forces, or from good-ol-fashioned NY muggings, I still am gonna go the the big Apple. She's-a-callin' and I can't resist her sweet siren song of boiling hotdogs, trash cans being knocked over by dogs, sirens, taxi's honking and middle aged Italian cliches yelling "Ehh, shut-up would ja?!"

It's gonna be awesome.

March my friend, MARCH! And for those of you wondering; yes, I will keep the blog going. In fact, it might actually be interesting! Not so... um... mondayne! YAY

IESSO

PS. Oh man! I am so clever, with the semi-literal image posting. Dang the cheat to the max!

UPDATES AND OTHER SUCH CLICHES

I'll be posting in number form today, hope that's alright. A lot of crap has gone down since a few days ago, here it is:

1. Pissed Sebastian off, but had fun nonetheless playing BASEBALL! It was good times. Had. By. ALL. *Photo's will be uploaded soon enough. Chillax.

2. My dad went into the hospital yesterday for some minor, but stressful surgery. My parents were freakin out, talking about death and all that scary stuff, and were getting a bit annoyed because I wasn't scared. But I knew everything would be ok, and it was. So that's good. He's home now recovering.

3. Because I was at the hospital I couldn't finish my work for the EPA, and had to get Marlene to do it (well actually she must have volunteered, which was really nice!) and Soryi had to do the project we were BOTH supposed to do. I just wanted to say thanks! And tell them that I REALLY appreciate them picking up the slack that I left behind. It really means a lot to me!!

4. My parents got mad at me and made me feel really guilty for not being able to save money. This is a complicated issue, with much layers of pain, so I don't really feel like going into it, suffice to say that they're not happy with me, and take it as a personal insult. They always take things personally, which makes it so much worse! And they tend to muddle up issues, and don't see things as seperate problems, and SOMEHOW seem to bring their parents into the coversation/arguments. So anyway feeling like sh*t.

5. Tanner came by to cheer me up/distract me/offer an escape from the house. Good stuff. We had a 2-person LAN party. My FIRST LAN party. For those of you who don't know LAN parties are basically where nerds get together and play video games for a while. We played some World War 2 shooting games. Nothing releives stress like the muted screams of Nazi's fleeing in terror. Well, it's true!


*Excuse the poor image quality. I left my camera at work, and I only had my phone.

6. Will be going to the beach and doing other fun things [like mini-golf] with Tanner and his GF. Also with the UNG. Which will hopefully be fun. It's a bit cold, but it might be nice in the sun. MIGHT. We'll see.

IESSO

PS> Sorry about today's post being so weak. And about not offering anything fun this week. It's been a bit like that. Not the best. On an unrelated note; I'll be finishing work at LiveWorm soon. Getting a bit sick of it, and plus we're getting some new kids in who don't seem so friendly. Hmm. There goes the fun!

THESE BOOTS WERE MADE FOR KICKING

...And that's just what I'll do, one of these days I'm gonna kick the crap outta you...



In all fairness it takes a lot of guts and talent to cover a song... Oh who am I kidding!? The Jessica Simpson cover of the AWESOME Nancy Sinatra song: 'These Boots Were Made for Walking' has GOT to be one of my most hated of songs. It's so bad that I actually posted about something I hate, thus breaking my rule of 'if you ignore it'll go away' (which incidentally is what my ex-wife said). It's just so shit. So generic 'designed by a commitee', throw in some 'modern beats', bikini girls, and voice modulators and add a dash of 'star' power and you've got a hit song. NO! Songs about being a woman in charge shouldn't be wispered. NO! It's just SSSSSSSSSSSSSsssssssssssooooooooooo horrible I boggles my mind. I spin myself into a dizzy rage just thinking about it! AAaaahhhh.

OH MAN! If it was ever possible to delete something from the internet, rather than heap more shit ontot the already flaming fires, I would delete all knowledge of that song cover. In fact, since I'm being all Orwellian here, I might go all out and delete her entirely. That would be awesome. Knowledge is power motherf*ckers!

IESSO

PS. One more rant; T-shirt that say FCUK on them. That really pisses me off too. 'Okay, we get it, it looks like it says FUCK!' Ha ha ha. We get it. One good version however was an Irish version saying FCEK. That was funny.

GREAT SCOTT!

We got 9/10 in the ADVANCED Back to the Future Quiz. Nuff said.

FAMILY TIES

HERE IS A TRANSCRIPT FROM AN EMAIL I SENT TO DERMOT REGARDING A PROBLEM I HAVE WITH MY MOM. ENJOY!

"Dermot

Deep and meaningfuls tonight, so watch out!

Being your age and all I was wondering how your parents treat you. My parents see me as their special little boy, which is fine I guess when they're in a good mood, but when my mom gets depressed (as she often does, and drink 8-9 glasses of wine, and starts crying) being the little boy becomes very difficult. I am forced to tread on VERY thin ice, either I obey her depression and listen to her, nodding and adding 'i'm so sorry' everyone once in a while, or I actually voice my opinions which may be against hers or something she doesnt want to hear, or from the opposite perspective and risk (or rather certainly) having her hate me. Either I get hurt by having her badmouth my father or relatives or whoever, or I hurt her but saying something against her point of veiw.

My mother is not the most understanding of people, she cannot listen to others points of veiws. It makes it EXTREMELY difficult to have an actual conversation with her, without her getting really mad and hold a grudge (which she does so well, everytime we have these talks she HATES me more and more). She says she doesnt want to end up in the same relationship that she has with her mother, never talking and hating each other, but I can see that happening if things keep going like this. If she wants me to listen to her vent that's fine, although I may resent it I can understand the need to talk, but she always forgets that A) i have no idea what she is talking about because she never lets me in B) I'm her son, not her psychiatrist C) If i was her pyschiatrist I would be able to offer counter-points without worrying about it being so deeply personal D) She would value the psychiatrists opions, because she doesnt value mine.

I can never argue with her because she treats me like some dumb kid, or I am terrified that I will upset her, and cause her to hold a grudge, so I dont say anything. So then she doesnt want to talk to me. Which is not good at all.

So tonight she was complaining about my grandparents and how they treated her. I tried to listen for a while not really imputting anything into the conversation and after a few hours I got sick of it and started suggesting things that might make her think. No. She gets mad! And i can hear a hatred in her voice. She can transfer all the hatred she has of her parents onto me. And its not temporary either, it adds up. I snapped and said all the things that ive written above about wanting to be seen as an adult, thus having opinions and that im not a psychiatrist but i will listen, but that she needs to remember that im her son, and things can hurt me...

she got really mad, and i got frustrated, and she thinks that i dont want to listen to her, but i kept insisting that I want to listen, but I also want to help her, but that that wasnt my job, but i would do it anyway, and that i love her, and want her to be happy, but i dont know how to bring her happiness.... etc etc etc...

she said "fine, I wont say anything to you"

I snapped. "No! That's exactly what I dont want to happen.! I want you to talk to me, but I need you to listen to me... etc etc"

"I do listen"
"But you dont listen to my opinions"
"I listen to your opinions ALL the time" *Bitter hatred

I feel like my opinions are not that of a friend or an equal but of a nuasance or a nagging son or someone selfrighteous

She told me I have no idea what Im talking about, and that everything I think is just my perception of reality.

OF COURSE IT IS! What else is there? I want to understand you, but I cant understand unless I can have a conversation and I cant do that unless I ask questions which may be offensive, which of course I cant do.

I dont know what to do or say. I feel torn between many different emotions. Firstly and most importantly I want to help my mother feel happy, BUT I need to be seen as equal or at least someone who's opinions are taken seriously, but in order to have valid opinions I need to understand the situation... etc etc.. basically, it all boils down to my mother holding grudges. I tried talking to her about that and apparently she doesnt. EVERYONE can see them. My dad, my brother, my uncles and aunts, my grandparents, they all see that my mother holds grudges and this pushes people away. I dont want to be pushed away so i dont say anything, therefore not helping her other than mindlessly listening, listening to her repeat herself over and over again, never making progress, just replaying the pain and guilt and anger in her mind.


I dont really expect any opinion, and I am fully aware of the complete amount of hypocrisy inherent in this email. But the difference is i completely and utterly value your opinions, however misguided or unsubstantiated they may be (although they've been pretty dead on so far)

From a terrified, guilt-ridden but also slightly angry
Elliott"

IESSO

PS. If you guys have opinions please let me know...

POSSIBLY THE BEST BOOK ON THE TOPIC OF TURTLE STACKING

I've been assigned to do a t-shirt for the Environmental Protection Agency (an alphabet government agency! I'm a spy) anyway they want something for kids. So naturally I did something silly. I really like the turtle (based on the Turtle & The Hare tale; the turtle enjoys his walk...) The shirt is for their 'Great Walks' program. Anyway the print wraps over the shoulder and has the logo's on the back. I hope they like it.... I do.

IESSO

PS. They also want some stickers and a notebook made up, but I didn't bother posting images of them because they're so similar. Please forgive me. I know you really, really care...

THAT SOUNDS ABOUT RIGHT

We went to my brothers apartment for lunch on fathers day (today) and it was okay. My brother has a knack for insulting me and saying the dumbest things, and generally making everyone feel crap so it wasn't great. It was okay.

We got to talking about acting, and my brother wanting to do said acting...

JOSH: Not everyone goes to uni before becoming an actor...
DAD: Yeah, but you need to learn how to act and become the character and stuff.
ME: You need to get into the roles....
DAD: You can't just say your lines... Anyone can do that. You need to learn how to act..
JOSH: Right, like Australian Idol.
DAD + ME: What?
JOSH: *rolls his eyes, because of our complete lack of knowledge* Nevermind...



Yeah, we're the idiots..

IESSO