NO GOOD CAPTION COULD BE THOUGHT OF AT THE TIME OF GOING TO PRINT...

I have a tendency to get myself into a state of stress. It normally relates to big things like life, love or relationships, or teeny-tiny things like saying the wrong thing and worry myself like crazy. This time is a combination of BIG things like life, and medium sized things like passing my classes.

I think I'm going to fail most if not all of my art theory classes. Not the end of the world you might say, but the problem is; if I fail this particular class again I will be kicked out of the degree! Which IS bad. Not only would I not graduate with all of my friends, but I won't graduate at all!

Luckily I've gotten extensions for my essays, tests and assignments, but I still am not motivated enough to actually do the work. I just can't seem to get into the zone. Or mood. Or whatever.

AND what's worse, I am looking forward to Liveworm because it's an escape from reality, from life, from my parents, from lost-love, from failing classes, from wasted opportunites and from a meaningless existence. Liveworm is not that. I shouldn't see it as that. But I do.

PS. I think I might be able to pull it off, hopefully just scraping through. But I'm REALLY stressed about it. If I seem to be rude, distracted or generally not a nice guy, please forgive me, I'm not feeling like my usual 'melancoly but still vaguely nice guy' at the moment.

PPS. I forgot to mention that I've started suffering from panic attacks! My chest hurts, I get really dizzy, and I can't breath properley. It really sucks. And I get them pretty frequently, when I'm about to fall asleep, as soon as I wake up in the morning and several times during the day. I've tried breathing deeply but it doesn't help much. Smoking helps, but the short-term benefits probably don't outweigh the long-term (what's the opposite of benefit??) bad-enefits....

PPPS. I don't ask you to feel sorry for me, but maybe cheer for me. That'd be cool. Perhaps get some Pom-poms and cheer me on. Yeah. And pleated skirts. (Now I'm going too far aren't I?)